How Many 5-year-olds Could You Take in a Fight?

I’m sure this is a question that’s kept you up at night. I know the thought certainly crossed my mind while being swarmed after my son’s birthday party as I dispensed those hateful, yet compulsory goody bags.

Thanks to howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com, you can take a short quiz and put that burning question to rest.

According to their website:

“This short survey will tell you approximately how many five year old children you could fight at once. Results are based on physical prowess, training, swarm-combatting experience, and the flexibility of your moral compass. Here are the ground rules:

• You are in an enclosed area roughly the size of a basketball court
• There are no weapons or foreign objects
• Everyone is wearing a cup (so no kicks to the groin)
• The children are merciless and will show no fear
• If a child is knocked unconscious, he is “out.” The same goes for you.”

I took the quiz and here’s my result below.

20

I was surprised at my high score. Maybe it was my martial arts experience? Or maybe it was that fact that I had no compunction about picking up a child and using him or her as a weapon to throw at other children. Whatever the case, there’s something comforting in knowing that I could take on a classroom of kindergarteners in the unlikely event they should turn feral and go Lord of the Flies on my ass.

How do you score?