Dear AA,

While I so do appreciate you landing me in this beyond-gorgeous land of South Florida in one piece, I do have a few bones to pick with you.

I was dedicated enough to arrive at the airport at 8 am for an 11 am flight. (Obsessive, yes, but the point is, I wanted to make the flight as smooth as possible for all involved.) Before doing so, I meticulously packed my carry-on and baggage to fulfill your requirements to the letter.

As much as I hate fast food, I followed your rules and did not pack any of my own nutritious choices, and instead, overpaid for what you had available for sale in the boarding areas.

This is me, doing my part.

Why couldn’t I count on you to put as much into our relationship as I had? There’s very few things I wake up at the crack of dawn for.

You, on the other hand, gave me a false sense of security by having the check-in and security checks go seamlessly. Everything was perfect. We boarded on time, I had a lovely window seat. (Then again, that was thanks to VW’s lovely travel coordinator, and not you.)

Why then, did we end up with a three-hour delay after said boarding (including a deplanement) over what was effectively a dim light bulb and a static-y phone? While I get that these are important aspects (whatever)…couldn’t you have checked it out before allowing us to board? And, if you realized it might take ALL afternoon to fix, perhaps you could have given us a meal credit? Or placed us on another plane?

I’ll have you know, I have hot dinner plans at Forge tonight that demand ample time to primp. Spending all afternoon wilting away in an airport? Not part of the plan.

So while I am now resting comfortably in this, my amazingly awesome hotel SUITE (I swear, the bathroom is bigger than my apartment!), and about to put on my little black dress and my brand-new Modern Vintage heels…I have to say my mood is somewhat tarnished. My day, a little less bright. And for that, I believe you most certainly owe me (another) free trip. Or at the very least, a cocktail.

Thank you.
AW
PS: To the café in JFK: My grilled chicken salad with candied pecans was missing the promised herb-coated croutons. While seemingly minimal, this window dressing was actually the reason I got said salad instead of the pesto chicken wrap, and was gravely disappointing – especially considering you overcharged for wilted greens. You, too, are in my dog house.

When the series ended several years ago, I canceled my HBO subscription and immediately started to pine for a Sex and the City movie. I think I pretty much lost interest in television, at that point, as well.

Now, the premiere is only a few days away! Short of being “that girl” and wearing a SATC t-shirt to the Thursday night midnight-showing (as-if), I’ve been on a dedicated research of SATC-inspired merchandise.

Check out some of the most recent sex-abulous findings:

Hello Lover

For emblazoned goodies including robes, hoodies, and yoga pants, visit HBO’s Hello Lover Shop. We love the stiletto tote bag for shoe-changing on the go. This is also a great place to pick up the Sex & the City Complete Series DVD set (right now on sale for $100 off list price!!!) to catch up on all the drama before the movie hits theaters.

Power Lingerie

Now even your undergarments can say, “I’m SO the Carrie!” Cosabella recently released their SATC lingerie collection which includes, of course, four mini-collections dedicated to each character. Prices range from $22 to $162. And speaking of lingerie, in episode 69, the sexiest of the city girls Samantha breaks up with Richard and gives back the beautiful pearl thong he had given her (a “powerful” piece of lingerie). Want your own? No prob! Just visit Yandy.com and order yours for about $64.

Arm Candy!

Bag Borrow or Steal has dedicated a whole section on their site to the handbag personality. Start by taking a purse-onality quiz, then browse designer bags by your favorite character! My favorite? The Prada Rose Satchel! (Currently on wait list, get in line, darling.)

Now, if we could only be so smart about preparing to pre-order tickets!!!

Happy Mother’s Day to my mommy!

Hope you all are giving/getting good presents this year! (I can’t share mine until it is received, but I think this time, I did *really* well!)

And a very special happy (first!) Mother’s Day to my shih tsu, Lily, who this year gave birth to four beautiful puppies!

I think I will begin each and every morning by saying thank you to my favorite local shaman.

The coolest thing just happened!

Apparently, my Chemistry.com column still has some steam. I just got off the phone with a producer who wants me to be a featured relationship expert on her WebTV program, based on some of the love/sex articles I’ve written. This is the best excuse *ever* to wear my new pink heels.

Except I’m currently on my floor in bunny slippers

If this happens, you all simply must watch! It’ll be like my SheKnowsTV segment…just…longer!

My world may get just a little more Sex and the City!

Check out today’s Gothamist headline:

http://gothamist.com/2008/04/30/slope_stroller.php 

Today’s horoscope:

You notice that something’s missing late in the day — but the odds are against theft being the issue. Try to retrace your steps (mentally if need be) until you stumble upon the place where you left it.

Great. As if *that’s* not going to spark my compulsive streak.

Dear Aly,
Here is your horoscope
for Thursday, March 20:

You are sorely tempted to make your move today — but hang on! Circumstances are still developing and if you can stand biding your time for one more day, you should be able to win big tomorrow.

This is the most disturbing thing I’ve ever seen.

The men in our lives are OBSESSED. It’s a madness: March Madness, that is. According to Yahoo! Web Life Editor Heather Cabot, there’s thousands and thousands of “March Madness Widows” every year, because women feel out of the loop, are disinterested or are intimidated in watching/playing alongside their men. The Girls’ Guide to March Madness helps these women understand the basic rules of the tournament and will help them feel confident in watching the games – or even filling out their own brackets. Check it out!

1. What is March Madness?  It’s more than that cooped up feeling you get from being in the house too long.  It’s also the NCAA Men’s Division 1 Basketball Championship – a single elimination tournament held each spring featuring 65 college basketball teams.  Also referred to as the “Big Dance,” it takes place over a three week period at different sites across the US, and the national semifinals or “Final Four,” has become one of the country’s most prominent sporting events.
2. Bracketology 101: What’s a bracket?  In addition to being something that can help hang a shelf, it’s also the way teams are organized and pitted against one another in the tournament . . . and it also happens to be how you can win $5 million by playing Yahoo! Sports Tourney Pick’em game: http://tournament.fantasysports.yahoo.com
3. Selection process:  Can you pick any team, what are the rules?  On “Selection Sunday,” the NCAA Selection Committee announces the 65 team field and seeds them according to their ranking and performance.  Teams can either play their way in by winning their conference championship, or they can be selected at large for having fared well during the regular season
4. Picking your teams: Survival of the Fittest.  Everyone knows a tiger usually beats a rabbit, but not necessarily in the NCAA tournament. While it’s generally a good bet to pick lower seeded, better teams in the early rounds, don’t be bogged down by stats and records – feel free to pick your teams based on uniform color or mascots, as the tournament is rife with upsets each year.  To learn more, go to Yahoo! Sports and Rivals.com for more information about specific teams.
5. Cinderella and the Big Dance? I thought this was basketball! Fans love when Cinderella shows up to the big dance, but it has nothing to do with fairy tales. The tournament has its own language, and here’s how to get in the conversation:
   • A team that’s not expected to win but advances through the tournament is called a Cinderella
   • The tournament itself is called The Big Dance
   • The third round of the tournament is called the Sweet Sixteen
   • The fourth round is called the Elite Eight
   • The final four teams play in, you got it, the Final Four
   • When a team wins the tournament, they literally cut down the nets
6. Root for the Little Guy: The tournament represents the best of the best in college basketball, but generally the teams seeded ‘11′ through ‘16′ are written off long before the tournament begins. Most of these teams will head home after a lopsided loss in the first game, but usually at least one will pull off an ‘upset’ win over a better school. While this will ultimately ruin a lot of brackets, fans love an underdog.
7. Knowledge Isn’t Necessarily Power: You’ll run into a lot of know-it-alls while watching the tournament. The truth is, you could guess on all your picks and you’d probably still beat at least one person who watched every game this year. Even if your bracket is busted (the teams you selected get eliminated), Yahoo! Sports offers a Second Chance game worth $1 million.
8. Watch Wisely: There are a lot of games in the tournament, played all over the country at all times of the day…and night. There are few surprises and few can’t-miss moments in the first round, and the second round isn’t much better. It’s exhausting to try and watch every game. Do yourself a favor and watch as little as necessary until the real action starts in the Sweet 16. This is where you’ll find the best teams, and the ones who will ultimately win.
9. Listen to your heart – They don’t call it women’s intuition for nothing! If your gut is telling you a team will win, listen to it, even if the stats or your friends say otherwise.
10. Healthy competition is important to all relationships, so match up your picks against your partner’s: Check online throughout the month to see who is ahead.  Bragging rights keep the romance alive, especially when they are yours!

Today’s horoscope:

You’re chafing a bit under someone’s authority, whether it’s legitimate or not. Do your best to get along, but if things start to get much worse, you may need to stage a mini-revolt. 

This describes pretty much every area of my life.