I must confess, I kill all living things. (Except puppies.)

I even once accidentally killed my fish. (Certain sea-life-loving best friends should not read the next few sentences…) But what happened was, once upon a time, my whole family was away on vacation for a few weeks, and I was fish-sitting. As I was a teenager, and sort of self-absorbed, I sort of forgot to feed him. Or change his water. Or acknowledge his existence in any way. Ultimately, he died, and disintegrated in his own filth. That’s about when my parents came home.

Anyway, sadly, this lack of natural caring instincts extends to flowers…which I kill. Much like plants, which I also kill. It seems, actually, the only living things I can’t destroy are, well, vermin.

Anyway.

I’ve realized I can end my reign of terror AND have an adorable centerpiece by embracing all things Edible Arrangements. Not only are they super trendy right now, but they are also entirely summer-fashionable AND great for the health conscious among us! I thought highlighting some of our new summer arrangements would be perfect for your readers-health conscious and trendy!

How great an alternative to flowers is this?? It’s pretty, it’s edible, it’s functional, it’s practical…and it may even be a little thought-provoking! (Friends, that is not a bad thing.) They have tons of varieties, but one of the hottest arrangements this summer is the Mango Kiwi Blossom, a mix of fresh mango wedges, juicy kiwi slices, strawberries, grapes and pineapple daisies. But they also have arrangements that are dipped in chocolate, for those of you who crave a little sin with your sweet. (I’ve been there!)

I have one gift certificate, good for a complimentary Edible Arrangements Mango Kiwi Blossom arrangement, to give away. To have your chance to win, answer the following fun questions:

1 - Why do you NEED to have an Edible Arrangement of your very own?

2 - Do you think you owning one (and eating one) will in some way contribute to saving the living things of this world? (Yes, 1 and 2 are related!)

3 - What is the saddest thing you’ve ever done to a living thing in your charge? (Plants, animals, people, all count.)

4 - Four LIFE CHANGING things you’ve learned from my blog this month. It’s true. Lives have been changed…read back and see for yourself!

Deadline August 1.

You know how people who work in a bakery lose their taste for sweets? (Well, in theory. I don’t actually believe that to be true…)

I have led a similar, almost more terrible fate. From my years of editing, I’ve lost the drive (or perhaps time) to read for pleasure. It happened slowly…and then one day I realized my library card had dust settling on it!

Then, recently, I began anew - I realized that while jotting notes on my Blackberry was a conducive way of passing transit time, one could also spend it, well, relaxing. And then I remembered the part of me that was long buried…the girl who would spend hours at a time lounging on her front stoop with a good, steamy romance novel. Or on the beach with…well, the same. A girl who, it seems, was not lost, but repressed, sadly, under layers of CrackBerry obsession.

I’m a little mad at my Blackberry right now (it’s doing weird, weird things, probably because it senses ensuing iPhone-envy), and thus, I’m totally OK with leaving it buried in my bag and turning, instead, for the pages of a good read…and now I have plenty!

I was recently gifted a BookSwim.com membership. BookSwim is the nation’s first and only hardcover/ paperback book rental club — similar to a “netflix for books”. They mail books “netflix-style” with no due dates, no late fees, and unlimited rentals per month. And they have tons to choose from! All of the latest titles abound, crossing genres - and it’s super easy to use to catch up on your (missed) reading. The more you read, the more value you get!

BookSwim (and Alytude!) wish to help you recapture your reading passion as well, and three readers will each win a 2-month BookSwim (unlimited!) membership. To have your chance to win, please leave me a comment with the most meaningful book you’ve ever read - and three things you’ve learned this week in my blog. (You know why….) Deadline is July 15. Good luck!

I’m part of the panel of relationship experts and bloggers contributing to Wake Up to a Breakup, a sexy new web-series.

Most of my first episode’s content isn’t up yet (it’s going to have some snazzy links and a bio), but for a preview of me being just a little bit silly, check out this link below. I’m the “Pink Wisdom” segment. So if you follow the instructions and click on a question, you’ll see me in about half of them. (For those of you who don’t already know, I’m the over-caffeinated blond in the white-black sundress.)

http://wakeuptoabreakup.com/PinkWisdom-August2008.html

www.kissingwithross.com

I think I need a shower now.

Even before I moved into my new hood, I used to visit all the time to hang out with my best bud. We had a bit of a routine: We’d meet at the Tea Lounge, sometimes enjoy a glass of half-price happy hour Chardonnay ($4!!!), and then take a walk across the Slope to Taro, our favorite sushi haunt. Along the way, we’d gab about our latest dramas, enjoying an eyeful of window shopping (and people watching) along the way.

Since moving, our routine hasn’t changed much - probably because it’s such an awesome one.

Those of you who aren’t from around here probably don’t know this, but Park Slope is a super trendy part of New York City known for two things: hipsters and pregnant women. It’s very interesting how the two go together. And while neither one of us is pregnant (thank God!), we do consistantly marvel at all the pregnancy-oriented services we pass. For instance, BodyTonic, a fitness studio next door to our favorite organic yogurt shop, is currently having free yoga classes on Saturday afternoons. We wanted to go! However, we could not. (Segregation!) Said class is only available to PREGNANT WOMEN. It was, alas, prenatal yoga.

We joked that since we are not currently “natal”, we are technically “prenatal” and thus are qualified. Sadly, no one understands us. (This too is a common theme.)

So, in a situation where you live in a hood INFESTED with pregnant people, and on the flip side, you see people you know starting to pop little bundles of joy (OK, no one I know personally is, but I’ve heard the horror stories), you may be starting to be invited to baby showers, and all that related stuff. You may even have a sister or cousin who is about explode, and you want to give her relief, but don’t know nipple butter from nipple clamps.

Truth be told, I actually saw the birth process twice. Once, several years ago, when I was in the delivery room when my friend Megan had her son. And, more recently, last year, when my shih tsu Lily gave birth. The puppies? Much better experience.

Anyway, you might as well be prepared for these (blessed?) events just in case they do happen.

A friend of mine has turned me on to Earth Mama Angel Baby, an awesome company that sells only natural, organic body care products and teas for pregnant women and their babies. Their web site is full of sweet, easy little gifts that your pregnant pals will really be able to use, plus they are safe (no hidden toxic chemicals) and you get credit for being thoughtful when you know you really rather be at that $4 happy hour than examining rattles.

The site is also full of information (and reviews from other moms) about what pregnancy is really like. TMI for me, but good to store away for the future (wayyyy, far in the future), or to forward to your friends to show them how much you care that they know all this good stuff. Just tell them to keep all the hemorrhoid and episiotomy talk to themselves.

So, check out the Gifts section for everything pregnant people and babies really need, from Natural Nipple Butter, a nipple cream for breastfeeding included in the A Little Something for the New Mama gift set, to Angel Baby Bottom Balm, their best-selling diaper cream that’s in the A Little Something For Baby’s Suitcase travel set. It’s the reality show of gift ideas, but stuff that people who (well, care) may actually use.

And, here’s something even better - you can help your friend/sister/aunt/coworker soothe their sore ass at no cost to you! (Seriously, I hear there are a lot of butt problems when you get pregnant.) I’ve got $25 gift certificates to give away to four winners, so you can get some goods, or if you’re too squeamish, gift up the certificate itself, for baby or mama stuff perfect for the next shower you are invited to.

Just leave a comment and tell me what you would buy with your gift certificate and who you would give it to! As always, the best answers win, and sending cute pix to turn on my maternal instinct, not a bad idea either. (Though you may have better luck showing me your puppy.)

Deadline July 15.

PS: Always use a condom.

I must say, I am deeply humbled at the outpouring of support following the MIA status of my beloved sunglasses. Readers have written in sharing stories of their own sudden losses, and Oakley has contacted me offering to send a new pair. Another fabulous institution (whom I will disclose next week) has invited me in to meet with their style advisor and select the perfect glasses for me.

It appears I will not be blinded by the summer sun after all. And, with Saturday being the first day of summer, I was sort of starting to worry!

I do want to be prepared for my summer face-ssories though (yes, I just totally made up that word) and decided to consult the experts. As the #1 sunglass supplier to the stars, SOLSTICE has helped me out (just in time!) and identified the hottest new trends for the summer season.

Here is what’s expected to get the temperature rising:

* High Shine - Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is wearing the sexiest shades of all? Mirror-like materials with metallic shine leave viewers on the runway wanting more. When the sun is shining or the camera is flashing, sunwear returns the favor! “High Shine” is a flash of the future with its sleek high-tech designs accompanied by the glass-like shine of metal and colorful plastics. “High Shine” shades can be found by designers Giorgio Armani, Jimmy Choo and Emporio Armani.

* Stealth Wealth - Ultra-luxurious jet setters know that confidence is all about how you wear it, not who you wear. “Stealth Wealth” styles offer minimalistic logos or iconic designer brand embellishments known only to those “in the know” or for those opting to fly under the radar. Styles from Gucci, Hugo Boss, Bottega Veneta and Boucheron illustrate this chic look.

* Rainforest - Welcome to a steamy new direction in sunwear. “Rainforest” styles are for those looking for lush, imaginative designs inspired by the colorful foliage and wooden textures of the rain forest. Rich plums, luscious greens, deep blues and earthy browns encompass the true look of the rainforest along with styles with wooden accents. Styles by Alexander McQueen, Balenciaga, Stella McCartney and Marc Jacobs give a first-class look at Paradise.

* Modern Vintage - Revitalized, renewed and refreshed, traditional favorites are back and better than ever with a modern twist! “Modern Vintage” inspired by classic looks with sophisticated styles like wayfarers,
aviators and cat-eye shapes provide a view with déjà vu. Designers offering a look back at the future in sunwear include YSL, Kate Spade, Juicy Couture and Diesel.

* Be Jeweled - Don’t be afraid to shine in a pair of shades with some detail. More than simple decoration, stones, crystals and studs make a bold statement in sunwear. Chunky and hard-edged, or delicate and refined, the effect is 3D and the look is sure to make heads turn. Prepare to be dazzled by the new jeweled styles. Styles by designers Dior, Valentino, Gucci and Marc by Marc Jacobs bling out the beauty in everyone.

Solstice Sunglass Boutique will be celebrating Summer Solstice tomorrow at over 100+ Solstice stores across the country. They will be giving customers a $50 gift card when they spend $195 thru July 31st and will also be offering a chance to win a $1,000 Solstice Sunglass shopping spree! (No purchase necessary) Visit www.solsticestores.com for more information. And, right here on Alytude, FIVE winners will each win a $75 Solstic Sunglass gift certificate! To have your chance to win, please post telling me about the absolute worst thing the summer sun has ever done to you. (I have been known to turn PURPLE!). Five best answers by July 1st win!

One more day to enter for your speakers!

Just scroll down a few posts and follow the instructions.

A Little Aly-tude has joined up with Fanscape and Wet n Wild for an awesome giveaway, just in time for showing your sexy side for summer!

Do not enter here, but if you go to:

https://secure.fanscape.com/signup.aspx?bandcode=SIGNUPGATEWAY&background=&headerurl=https://secure.fanscape.com/noheader.htm&textcolor=ffffff&fontsize=1&face=verdana,helvetica,arial&bgcolor=000000&framerows=0&source=OPU-4132&requiredtextcolor=ff0000&requiredtextcolorin=red&pagecode=OPU-4132&skin=newContestSignUpNonMembers.xslt&partner=14238070

and enter by 6/16, one reader will win a gorgeous new Juicy Couture bag stuffed full of Wet n Wild cosmetics!

Someone please enter and send it to me…I don’t even have a Juicy bag yet!

Enter now!

So, I just returned home from a trade show and luncheon at the Marriott, feeling rather wilted and sleepy - and wishing I was back in South Beach.

I popped online, and received a G-Chat IM from a friend I hadn’t spoken to in years, saying (sic):

So i went to nypost.com the other day, and got a big pop-up ad — it was for sheknows, and there was your blog, right there on the ad.

i think you’re technically famous now

so congrats

Holy wow. I had no idea! Have any of you seen this ad???

Note: That’s what the ocean is supposed to look like.

(The view from the roof of my hotel.)

I promise to stop gushing and go back to posting about normal stuff now.)